


Roommates

by abookthief



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: M/M, Roommates
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-14
Updated: 2014-01-28
Packaged: 2018-01-08 12:23:28
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 14,827
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1132614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/abookthief/pseuds/abookthief
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Liam moves in to Zayn's apartment as his new roommate. They sort of know each other for two years. And maybe Zayn's in love with Liam. And maybe Liam hates Zayn.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys! SO. This is mostly Liam/Zayn, a little bit of Larry. This is my first fic and english is not my native language and i've never written anything in english longer than some like 500 words. (so i'm sorry for mistakessss) so thank you for reading and your opinions are desired! Also there is definitely gonna be a happy ending because i'm a sap, yeah. and there's gonna be smut too, but i just have to figure it out how to write it not in a shitty way. well. :D byeee xx
> 
> also this is pure fiction and it has nothing to do with anyone actually real. obviously.

Zayn knows this is not a good idea. He knew it from the beginning but the thing is he needs the money. And there isn’t many people who want to move to his shitty apartment. Well there are but Zayn doesn’t want to end up with a drug dealer or something as a roommate. And when Niall suggested Liam’s looking for a place to stay…Alright Zayn knows he should have said no. But he didn’t.

So now he’s walking around the small living room, waiting for Liam to arrive. Zayn seriously have no idea why Liam even wants to live with him. Well it probably has something to do with the fact, that he needs a place to live and since he quit school and now when he started working in the workshop across the street, Zayn’s cheap apartment seems like the best option. But he honestly doesn’t know how they’re going to do this whole roommate thing, because Liam probably hates him. Not that he ever told him though.

Liam’s the best friend with Niall, who lives with Zayn’s school mate Harry. When Zayn thinks about it, the world really is an awfully small. Because when he moved to the city, he wanted his own apartment. He was sick of having roommates who steal his stuff or are just common dickheads.

He found a small flat he was perfectly able to pay for, since he works at comic shop and his parents were supported him. Yeah, were supported him. Zayn’s mom got fired and he has two younger sisters, he knows it wouldn’t be fair to take the money when it’s not necessary.

And then Niall came up with the roommate idea. See Niall is Zayn’s neighbor. Really cool Irish guy, Zayn would take him as his roommate immediately but he already lives with Harry. Who turned out to be Harry’s school mate. Well they share just two subjects but since they live next each other they became really good friends.

It’s really easy to be friend with Harry and Niall and it means something when Zayn says that becomes he’s not really good with this “friendship” thing.

One day, when they were at Niall’s, sprawled on a couch, floor whatever, drinking cheap beer and watching Love Actually…well Harry was watching Love actually. Niall was bickering the whole time about Harry’s horrible taste and how he never let him choose “the movie of a week” again. Zayn was eating a pizza, half lying on a carpet.

“My mum got fired.” He said to no one in particular. “I need to make more money or move out I think.” he wasn’t completely serious but he knew something had to be done.

Niall’s reaction was so quick, Zayn definitely didn’t expect it. “You know what? You should find a roommate!” he said, sounded almost triumphantly.

“..Ok…” Zayn said, unsure.

“But you know how it always ends up. I mean you have Harry but I always get someone who seems normal at first…”

“ Harry’s not normal. He’s an idiot.” Niall interrupted him and Harry threw a fist full of popcorn at him, laughing. “y’know it’s true!” Niall said defensively.

“Anyway,” Zayn continued, “they always seem pretty much alright and then month later they steal my fucking tv and disappear. It happened twice.” he adds, showing two raised fingers in front of Niall’s face.

Zayn wasn’t drunk. At least he though.

“Alright I know but guess who’s looking for a place to live?” Niall said. “Liam. And hey it would be so cool if he lived here, Zayn! You should call him now.” He adds, tossing his phone to him. Zayn caught it, confused.

“What?” he wasn’t drunk. “He can’t. I mean he can’t live here. He hates me. And he wouldn’t want to live here anyway.” He said.

Harry apparently stopped watching the movie since Zayn and Niall became more entertaining and in that moment he just started laughing maniacally. Zayn ignored it. Harry is weird 80% of the time.

“Nah, you just don’t know him well. If you ever really talked, you’d like him. Also I’m sure he doesn’t hate you.” Niall said convincingly.

Harry laughed so hard now Zayn thought he’s gonna choke on popcorn.

“Wait, you really are serious” Harry said, still laughing. “You really don..”

“Shut the fuck up Harry.” Niall interrupted him. He didn’t look amused at all.

“Alright, I didn’t know it’s really a secret.” He said and looked at Zayn weirdly.

Zayn was confused. What were they even talking about? Wait what was he talking about? Right. Liam being his roommate. Maybe it wasn’t bad idea. At least he’s not gonna rob him, right. And having a hot guy living with you, using the same bathroom ….OK stop this now he though and he opened his eyes. Maybe he was drunk. Drunk and still holding Niall’s phone.

“Alright. But like can you write the message? I’m not really able to…right now ” he said and giggled. He really did giggle. Zayn remembers it. How he even could be this fucking stupid. And how could Niall be so fucking stupid.

Anyway, they sent Liam the message and nothing could be done about it. Otherwise Zayn would be an asshole. But he is not. And even though it was almost midnight, Liam answered almost immediately.

“He asks when he can move in” Niall said happily. “This will be so awesome you know!” right, of course Niall said it would be awesome, he’s Liam’s fucking best friend Zayn though.

“As soon as he can would be great.” Zayn said. This is going to end up so bad.

Another message. “Tomorrow then!” Niall said loudly.

“`s great. It’s Friday so we can have like a welcome party or something. Liam’d love it” Harry adds, still laughing.

This is going to blow up in his face. Zayn fucking knows it.

********************

They know each other for two years. They meet often…well occasionally on parties or they even went camping together one time. And it was probably the most awkward camping in the modern history Zayn thinks. It should have been just weekend full of fun and relax and shit like that but he get so drunk he didn’t remember a thing but the next morning Liam was weirder than usual. Not that he asked him what happened.

Also not that he could ask Harry because he passed out long before Zayn get totally wasted. And Niall… well. How to ask somebody whether you hit on his best friend when you were wasted or not. Nah, better leave it and act like nothing happened.

Two years and Zayn is pretty much sure he is in love with Liam from the first moment he met him. It was on a party at Louis’ parents place. They are like fucking loaded or whatever.

Back then Zayn didn’t really know who Louis Tomlinson was but apparently Niall knows everyone.

Anyway, rich people have swimming pools. Like all of them. It’s a thing, Zayn is convinced about it. When he, Niall and Harry arrived, there were people everywhere but the biggest crown was around the pool because, yeah, of course, some dickhead was going to jump into the pool off the roof. Zayn really didn’t and well still doesn't understand how people could be so stupid and doing danger things like this in the name of fun.

Whatever, he’s not gonna be the one who ends up with fucking skull fracture.

“Ten, nine, eight..!!!” people around him start yelling and Zayn saw the guy on the roof flexing his muscles jokingly. He was fit, not that Zayn could tell, really, because he was pretty far.

“Hey look! It’s Liam!” Niall said loudly “you know, Liam-Liam!”

“Sure I know” answered Zayn. “You talk about him like all the time. I’d say you wanna fuck him if you weren’t you know, straight.” He said, laughing. But you never mentioned he’s hot, he thought.

“Three, two…” people continued and after they yelled one the guy jumped off the roof. When his body broke through the surface, water splashing everywhere, people starts laughing and screaming. And then they started jumping into the pool, too.

“You’ll like him! He’s fun! Wanna beer?” he said already leaving Zayn, shoulder pressing people and heading towards the summer house. His head turn to facing him though, waiting for Zayn’s answer. He yelled yes and Niall disappeared in the sea of people.

Zayn stood there alone, Harry was nowhere to seen, as usual. He was probably drinking his fourth shot somewhere. The guy, now Zayn knew it’s Liam, swam to the edge of the pool and climbed out. Just like that, only with the strength of his muscled arms.

When Zayn saw him close enough, only in black shorts, water dripping down his body, he could definitely tell he’s fit. Actually more than that. Zayn really didn’t want to stare but these things just kind of happen, obviously. And Liam stood there, talking to some group of people. One girl, with dark hair and really pretty face immediately put her arm around his waist, didn’t care Liam was totally wet. He hugged her back a kissed her quickly.

Zayn just stood there, on the same spot not really sure what he’s suppose to do. He couldn’t just walk to the group and introduce himself. It really wasn’t his thing. So he just waited. And totally didn’t stare at Niall’s hot as fuck half-naked friend, who obviously wasn’t gay. Not that it changed anything even is he was.

“Here’s your beer!” said Niall who suddenly appeared in front of him. “What are you looking at?” he continued, looking in the same direction as Zayn. “Or should I say who?” he laughed, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. “some interesting hot guy? Man, you need to get laid.” He said as he sipped from his cup.

“What? Nothing. I’m just…looking around. Looking for you actually.” Zayn answered, changing the subject. “Thanks for the beer. But I think I should go back. I have shit to do. Like shit load of….shit” he said awkwardly.

This is so not his scene. Parties. People. He went just because Harry literally dragged him out of his apartment. “you can’t just study all the time! You’ll go OR I’m staying here with you. Singing you sad ballads the whole night to remind you how pathetic your life is. It’s fridayyy! You know It’s gonna be fun. Come on, I’ll get you drunk!” it’s always like this. And maybe it doesn’t seem like it sometimes, but Zayn is actually thankful to Harry. Even though he abandons him in the moment they get there. It’s not that he does it on purpose, he just kind of get lost. And also very drunk. Every single time. And you don’t just leave your wasted friend in some strangers house.

“Nonsense! This party’s really rad! Have you met Louis? He’s really..” Niall said but something caught his attention before he even said what’s so awesome about this Louis guy. “Hey Liam” he yelled, “over here!”

Fuck. Zayn sips from his cup, doesn’t really know what else to do. Fuck fuck fuck. Just don’t be awkward, he though as he stared at Liam again. He really is gorgeous. He separated himself from the group, and from his most likely girlfriend and went towards them.

He was tall as Zayn probably and had tattoos everywhere, not as much as Zayn though. He had brown hair, brown puppy eyes and bright smile. He was so muscular he could probably pick him up easily, and fuck him senseless against th… alright Zayn’s not going to go this way. No. He. Is. Not. he though and sipped his beer again, nervously and stared at his shoes instead.

So maybe he really needed to get laid. Niall was right. This was not what normally happens to him, wanting to jump people he doesn’t even know.

“Nialleeeer!” Liam says happily and hugged him. “’m glad you could make it! Haven’t seen you in ages!” he was obviously drunk. Yeah sure he was otherwise there is no reason for jumping off the fucking roof.

“You’re Zayn, right! ‘s like I know everything about you already, ha” He said to him.

Zayn had no idea what he’s talking about. But then Liam hugged him and Zayn didn’t expect that. He had no time to move his hand holding the beer so the cup was squeezed between them, the liquid spilled all over Zayn’s t-shirt and Liam’s …well abs mostly. Zayn was not in good mood and than this. Awesome.

“Oh wow I’m so sorry, man!” Liam said abruptly, looking truly concern about it. “I didn’t mean to do..”

“It’s ok, I’m leaving anyway so, it was good to meet you though.” Zayn says, didn’t really care about the shirt. He just wanted to get out of here. He really should have stayed home.

“No! Come with me, I’ll get you something to wear. Also I get you another beer. Or vodka. Whatever you want!”

Zayn looked puzzled at Niall but he just grinned and didn’t say anything. Liam grabbed his arm and leaded him towards the house.

They ended up in a huge kitchen, but there were no other people. Actually the whole house was empty.

“Louis doesn’t let people in. His parents would kill him. Just in the summer house.” Liam answered Zayn’s question before he even asked. “Wait here I’ll get you some clean t-shirt.” He said and ran the stairs to the first floor. Zayn leaned against the wall, didn’t really know what was going on. Why he even followed Liam here. But then he was back, holding black t- shirt. “It’s mine actually but it will fit you well” Liam says. “I live here now until I find a place to stay.” He added, leaned against the opposite wall.

“Yeah well, thanks.” Zayn said unsure. “I mean you didn’t have to this.” He took the t- shirt. It had yellow batman logo on a chest. Great, so not that he’s just hot and cute he’s also a comic fan. Well probably.

Zayn really didn’t want to overthink the whole situation, or the fact that he was about to strip his drenched shirt in front of the really fit still half naked guy so he just did it as quickly as possible and completely avoiding Liam’s eyes. The shirt was big on him. Well obviously, Liam was bigger than Zayn

“Thanks again. You’re into Batman, huh?” Zayn asked feeling really stupid. Oh wait. Liam was stupid. If he wasn’t he wouldn’t be standing here, almost naked.

“No. Actually I am the Batman. But it’s a secret you know. Nobody knows. Well now you know. Shit.” He said and laughed loudly. Yeah, he was definitely drunk.

“Maybe you should like…put some clothes on, too. Its getting cold.” Zayn continued unable to come up with anything else since Liam just stood there, only in those stupid black shorts. He knew his face was definitely going red. Thank gods the light in the kitchen wasn’t on and there was just this dim light from the hall. Liam laughed again.

“Yeah, maybe.” He said but he just stood there and stared at Zayn. “Or maybe you should take yours off - ” He paused. He fucking paused and Zayn gasped. What??

“oh I mean we could like jump to the pool together it’s fun. I love water. Do you like water?” he continued, didn’t notice Zayn’s shocked face. Or maybe he did and just ignored it.

Zayn didn’t understand what Liam wanted from him. What was going on? They never even met before. Well properly. Zayn actually saw Liam few times but it was always just moments like when they passed in the corridor when Liam visited Niall. They never spoke before. And Zayn didn’t even know how he looked like. So why was Liam acting so weird? It didn’t make any sense an Zayn wanted to leave. He needed to get out of the kitchen with this stupid dim light and stupid cute Liam who acted like he knew Zayn.

“I – what? No! I mean I like water but I’m not gonna jump to the fucking pool now.” Liam looked suddenly almost sad. Fuck. Puppy eyes should be banned, Zayn thought.

“Alright. I’m just…don’t get lost ok, or …will you wait for me here? I’ll just grab something quickly!” he said and turned to ran the stairs again.

Zayn though for a second he saw Liam’s checks went red but he couldn’t be sure. He was back faster that the first time, surprisingly, tugging his shirt down his chest as he entered into the kitchen. The grey sweatpants were hanging too low on his hips and yeah, he totally hadn’t got underwear. Zayn really didn’t have to know this.

“So, where’s the beer then?” Zayn asks abruptly, leaving the kitchen. He knew Liam was behind him, closing the kitchen door.

“You have really cool tattoos.” Liam said suddenly.

What the actual fuck? “Thanks..?” Zayn didn’t turn to face him.

He just got out of the house, and followed the people. It was the best change how to find the alcohol Zayn though. Liam went still behind him and Zayn didn’t know what to do. He was drunk and cute and Zayn was sober and awkward. He was panicking internally but then he saw Harry, Niall and some other guys. He headed their way immediately.

“Heyyy Zaynee!” Harry welcomed him and hugged him tightly. Great, so he was wasted already.

“May I intr…inrto… May I introduce you our today’s host – mister Louis Tomlinson.” Harry said, laughing and started clap.

“Hi, I’m Zayn, nice to meet you. This party’s really awesome.” Zayn said, shaking his hand.

“Nice t-shirt.” Louis said amusedly and he looked at Liam. “Anyway your friend here seems pretty wasted already. I could …”

“I need to go actually” Zayn said immediately, thankful for an actual reason to leave. “I’ll get him home.”

“` r you sure? You could all sleep here, I mean I don’t mind. You’re Liam’s friends so…”

“You!” Harry said loudly and pointed a finger to Louis. “You are sooo cute. Can I keep you?” he giggled.

“Alright Harold. Time to go to sleep.” Louis said. “I’ll help you with him. If you really want to leave I can call you a taxi.” He continued. “Hhaha he called me Harold, Zayynee! You’ve heard that right. Oh he wants me.” He giggled again. “I know you want me Lou! And we cou-“ Zayn covered Harry’s mouth with his hand.

“Alright I hope you will remember this tomorrow. And you know what? Even if you don’t, I’ll gladly remind it to you.” Zayn said, mostly to himself since Harry pretty much passed out on his shoulder and Louis stood far enough to not hear what Zayn said, calling the taxi.

“Bye Zayn!” someone called, sounded almost disappointed. He turned his head and saw Liam waving at him. He must had been really drunk.

*****************************************

So “Liam/Zayn” relation ship was doomed from the first time they officially met. But Zayn realized it after a few other times they saw each other. First we have this `wow Zayn we really should go to see the new batman movie. Like all of us` suggested by Harry who never in a million years watches movies like this. So it was obvious to Zayn that this whole thing was actually Niall’s idea because he really wanted to have is own gang of friends or whatever. And Zayn used to think Harry was weird. Yeah, right.

Anyway, the whole thing ended up…well lets say it wasn’t fun at all. They met in front of the cinema, Niall and Liam arrived after Zayn and Harry. Well the point is that Liam was fucking weird the whole time. Like he was angry with Zayn for some reason. At least he said hi to Zayn so. Well. And it wouldn’t be that bad if they actually didn’t end up sitting next to each other. Yeah, not even joking. Zayn was sitting between Liam and some older women. Great.

“So which Nolan’s batman movie’s your favorite?” Zayn asked Liam feeling utterly stupid after a long moment of complete silence, Harry and Niall left to buy food. Seriously? Seriously?? Zayn needs new friends. Like now.

“both’re alright.” He answered, not even looked at Zayn.

Fucking awesome. He really didn’t understand. When they first met, Liam actually acted like they knew him already. Sure, he was drunk. But what was the actual point of this if he was looking like all he wanted was punch Zayn in the face the whole time? The movie didn’t even started yet. He got kind of lost in his thoughts but he came back after he heard Liam and Harry laughing quietly next to him. Niall was still somewhere, probably buying nachos or some other annoying food that, if you ask Zayn, should be banned in cinemas. I don’t want to listen to your crunch, thanks.

This was really ridiculous. Also pointless. Zayn didn’t remembered a thing because Liam sat next him, their arms almost touching but otherwise he ignored him completely. Zayn didn’t get why he was so relaxed and funny and cute when he talked to Harry – they didn’t know each other _that_ well, Zayn though, and he wasn’t jealous. Why would be, right.

He actually surprised himself when he tried few more times to talk to Liam but it always went pretty much like the first time.

When the movie ended, Liam said quick goodbye and basically ran out of the place. Zayn died and this was hell. He totally knew it.

When he got home, he would love to unscrew his head and rinse it with bleach.

Zayn kind of get over the fact he’s not ever going to cuddle him every morning after he wakes up - not that it stopped him from admiring Liam from the distance, but he though they could be at least friends. But apparently not.

Zayn is convinced Liam has two modes specially for Zayn, also they totally depends on whether he is or isn’t drunk. Because when Liam isn’t drunk, he acts just like in the cinema. Basically ignoring Zayn, the annoyance almost tangible, avoiding be near to him. But once he is drunk, he’s unbelievable friendly and cute. Well Zayn saw Liam drunk just three times, first time at the Louis’ pool party. But this is bacially the reason, he’s in love with him. Because when Liam’s drunk, he acts towards Zayn like they actually were friends.

But then the camping happened and Zayn still doesn’t really know what exactly happened and maybe nobody but Liam knows, but something did happened. Must have. And since Liam’s being all weird and shit, Zayn is like 130% sure he hit on him. He doesn’t even know if Liam knew he was gay. Fuck. And next time they saw each other - which actually was the last time the saw each other before Liam’s moving in, just confirmed Zayn’s guess. It was at Louis’ again, and Liam showed up with some girl. It wasn’t the one Zayn saw at the pool party. He didn’t even knew if Liam was dating someone though, but its not the point. But this was the first time he actually brought somebody, a girl, with him. It was like Liam slapped him, or like a huge banner “I case you forget - I’m not gay”. Zayn didn’t know how to feel. Like an asshole who wants to fuck his straight not so much friend, or like a victim of homophobia.

Fuck. Zayn hates coming out to people.

He didn’t really feel like spending time with happy couple, well could be couples if Harry and Louis weren’t stubborn fucks and admitted already they love each other hopelessly. So he left, telling them he’s not feeing very well, which wasn’t even a lie, really.

**************************

And now, after last night, when he offered Liam to live with him, well. He really didn’t think this through. He should be here any moment now and Niall who was supposed to be here too, but he is definitely not here. He’s probably hunting for something to eat. Fucking Niall with his fucking appetite. And Zayn is not panicking. He is not. He just doesn’t know what to do with his hands right now. Happens sometimes even the best of us, right. So he just sits on the couch, looks around the small flat. Well it doesn’t that small. At least it wasn’t for a one.

There is a living room with kitchen, not that Zayn cooks really, small bathroom and two bedrooms. The second one Zayn used as an art room but he just moved all his stuff to his own room. He can’t do much about the painted walls now though. The whole Liam’s moving in was really a quick decision.

Zayn heard the doorbell and stands up quickly. Alright. He can do this. He can totally do this. He goes to the door and opens it. Of course there is Liam standing in the hallway, a duffle bag in each hand.

“Hi Zayn.” He says, sounds almost nervously. “Hi, come on in!” Zayn replies, steps aside to let Liam in. And mentally high five himself for keeping it cool.

“Here’s your room, “ Zayn continues, gestures towards the door in front of him “You can put there your stuff. Or just put it whenever, I don’t really mind. I’ll show you the rest.”

Liam tosses his bags to his new room, not really looking inside and walks back to Zayn. “Show me the place then” he grins.

“Right..”

They stand in living room slash kitchen now, since they already passed small corridor. “So this” Zayn says, opens his arms wide “is our living room. The tv’s shit, the last roommate robbed me actually. And the view is into the brick wall but the couch is the most comfortable thing ever. Also my favorite thing I bought. So if you bring people here, no fucking on my couch.” Zayn says and turns so he’s facing Liam. He’s not really sure how he even get it out of his mouth, but it needs to be said. Also really. No fucking on a couch. At least no other people…Fuck. Zayn really needs to stop imaging things.

“Oh I- I mean I would never…like..ok no fucking on a couch. Got it.” Liam stammers out, his cheeks going red as he stares at the brown leather sofa.

Why he is so adorable, Zayn thinks. He turns again and goes towards the “kitchen”. Its not really a separated room, its just the part of the living room but Zayn doesn’t really mind since he cooks maybe twice a year.

“Yeah well, this is kitchen but more importantly there” Zayn says and opens one of the cabinet “Is a fridge. It’s supposed to look like a cabinet. I don’t know, it’s weird.” He adds, and turns right.

“This is bathroom. Nothing fancy, also the door lock is broken. I don’t really care but” Zayn feels so embarrassed but be better get this done. And maybe there’s no reason for freaking out, Liam probably doesn’t give a shit Zayn’s gay. “we can let it fix. If you-“

“’s alright.” He replies easily. “it’s nice in here. I like the paintings. It’s yours, right?” Liam continues, conversationally.

“Yeah well, thanks. I’m…i study art, yeah. I mean it’s mine.” He said, he knows his face going red. “The place is a shithole though. But I like it here. Anyway.” Zayn goes towards Liam’s new room.

“About the paintings. Ugh, you moving in was really sudden decision” he continues and steps inside “and this room was actually kind of my art room and like.. I hadn’t got time to-“

“Wow” Liam says and Zayn stops speaking. “This is really cool.” He adds and looks around the room.

Two walls are painted with some comic graffiti mix, Zayn doesn’t really know what it is. He just felt creative in the middle of night, and he had no canvas to paint on.

“You don’t have to repaint it. I’ll keep it that way.”

There isn’t much furniture in the room. Only old closet and armchair Zayn doesn’t have any room to move it.

“Do you mind if i…I mean I didn’t expect to move somewhere so fast either. So. Um can I sleep on your couch until I buy a bed or work something out?” Liam mumbles.

“What?” Zayn says. What? But yeah, of course Liam doesn’t have a bed. He left his parents house and than stayed at dorm or at Louis’ or…somewhere. Zayn doesn’t really know.

“I have a spare mattress.” Zayn says quickly. What? What the fuck? Why he just did that? Oh right. He doesn’t want Liam to occupy the living room all the time. Yeah. And it would be cool to actually be friends since they live together. And this is friendly.

“I mean it’s not like new or anything. It’s just…I bought new like a month ago but didn’t get rid off the old one. Um, it’s in the basement. And there are also some wooden pallets, cos I used to have…you know. I can help you with it. If you’d like. You can use the closet too. I don’t need it.” They stare at each other and than Liam turns around abruptly, kneels and began to search for something in his bag.

“That would be…yeah that would be great. Thank you, Zayn, really.” He gives Zayn a quick look, and stands again.

“would mind if we go get it now? If you have time. Because I’m leaving to work in like an half an hour and won’t be back till five. Or just tell me where…” he says, standing there, in his stupid tight light jeans and black t-shirt.

“Sure, come with me.” Zayn thankful for something to do. Otherwise they would probably just sit on a couch until Liam went to work. You know, since he hasn’t got a fucking bed.

Zayn lives on the fourth floor and the elevator doesn’t work. Again. Well at least they had to go just three times since they were two but Liam would totally do it on his own, not even break a sweat. He is so much more fit than Zayn it’s almost embarrassing. They brings the mattress and wooden pallets into the flat and Zayn jumps on the couch.

“So when you gonna bring the rest of your stuff?” he asks.

“there not really much to bring. Actually. I mean I have more things but just not here. It’s in my parents house.” Liam replies, doesn’t seem like it bothers him. “I’ve been couch surfing for like two years so…mostly at Louis’ place. We know each other for ages. Anyway I need to go now so…I just take a quick shower..?” the lasts sentence sounds more like a question and Zayn lifts his head from the couch and looks at Liam. He just stands between the door, unsure looks on his face.

“’s all yours. Soap’s there, you can use it if you don’t want to like…search your bags now.” He says, gesturing vaguely towards the door.

“Thanks.” It’s all Liam replies before he disappears in his room. Minute later he comes out again with some work jeans, old t-shirt and a towel and heads towards the bathroom. Zayn really doesn’t see the point of having a shower, he's going to get dirty in like an hour, since he fixes cars.

Liam closes the door behind him, can’t really lock it though, and the apartment is filled with a sound of running water right after it. Zayn lies down again, throws his arms over his face.

Until now it wasn’t that bad. Well it definitely could be worse. They actually had some sort of a conversation, right. And now Liam’s casually using Zayn’s bathroom. Well Zayn and Liam’s bathroom from now on. Also he’s probably naked. No, he is naked. Fuck. Zayn so can’t afford to imagine this. It’s their first day together and he’s fucked already. But before he can do anything else he realizes he can’t hear the running water anymore and then Liam comes out of the bathroom.

Zayn sits on a couch and looks at Liam, who’s already in the small corridor, leaning forward and putting on his shoes. The hair on his neck is still wet. His t- shirt turns up a bit so Zayn can see the small of his back and black boxers because his jeans are too fucking low. He is staring at Liam’s ass now. He is staring and he can’t make himself stop.

“There is a welcoming party at Niall’s tonight. He probably told you already but you know….” Zayn says eventually, stands up. “Also I have keys for you.” he adds and fishes it out from his pocket. “I let them make today.”

“Thanks.” Liam says and quickly looks at Zayn and grabs the keys. “I’ll see you there then.” He adds but he just stands there. Zayn is not sure what he should say or do but before he makes something up, Liam says “Well I’ll better go.” and leaves the flat quickly.

Zayn stares at the closed door, not sure what to do now. He doesn’t have class…well he did in the morning but he had other things to do, Liam things to be more specific. Not that he'll admit it if you asked him. And he kind of assumed he’ll be helping to Liam with moving so he doesn’t have any plans. He didn’t expect Liam leave so soon. Harry is at work or school now, who knows where Niall is but as he haven’t came by now he probably totally forget about it. So now what.

There were all those things they brought from the basement and Zayn gets this idea that he could move it into Liam’s room. Because it’s not like he invades his privacy since he doesn’t even have any stuff there, right. Also if Liam goes from work to the party, he would have no time to do it himself, so he would end up on Zayn’s sofa. See? There is perfectly reasonable explanation for why it’s totally normal if Zayn makes bed for Liam. Right.

He starts carrying the things into Liam’s room. There is actually only one place where the bed could be since the room is not that big. He arranges the wooden pallets carefully. He already did it once, so there is no need to measure it. And then he just throw the mattress onto the pallets. Its looks really good though. Zayn used to have it before he bought his own bed.

Alright he has really nothing to do and since Liam doesn’t have a bed he definitely doesn’t have pillow or blanket and sheets so there is no point in asking him. And Zayn really doesn’t mind. He has spare, anyway. So yeah he may or may not makes Liam’s bed. The walls of the room are darker that in any other room, because Zayn’s got wild so the white sheets he chose look really good he must admit. He sits on the wooden floor and tries not to think about how pathetic he is.

And it gets even worse because what he’s about to do now definitely takes a cake. Zayn really, really wants to just get the fuck out of his roommate bedroom but like when he had the pallet bed, the best thing was that you could wrap Christmas lights around the pallets however you want and it looks rad. Also it looks cozily as fuck and Zayn maybe feel a little bad about Liam’s living situation and wants to make him feel like home.

The problem is Liam has no idea Zayn’s in love with him so it probably makes the whole situation a little awkward, and there is still a possibility that Liam just punches Zayn in the face when he comes back. But like not that Zayn destroys the thing he made and adding some light can't make it _that_ worse, right.

It took him about ten minutes to wrap the lights around the pallets and then he leans against the wall and looks around the room. He likes it, he really does. The Christmas lights are basically small stars on a transparent wire so it doesn’t look distracting against the light wood and when he turns them on, it illuminates the room dimly.  The painted walls look even better than in a daylight.

Zayn gets out of the room and lies on couch again. He is so fucked. The best thing that could happen would be, Zayn thinks, if Liam went straight to Niall’s, get wasted and then go to sleep without questions and next morning he wouldn’t be mad about Zayn touching his stuff (well technically he didn’t, really) but like he slept in the bed already. Also he would be hangover and lets face, when you have a hangover the last thing you want to do is deal with a world.

Well. From all this overthinking Zayn falls asleep and when he wakes up its getting dark. He decides to get shower and prepare for a party. It’s at Niall’s place since his apartment is bigger than Zayn’s. Not that he knows how many people come. He knows about Niall and Harry, obviously, Louis, Lou with Tom from from the second floor and maybe some more. Maybe Liam’s girlfriend. And Zayn is not jealous.  He doesn’t want to be there too soon but once again, he doesn’t really have nothing else to do. He could study, of course, like he always does, but he can’t really focus on anything today.

The shower is quick and cold, Zayn really doesn’t want to risk any inappropriate thoughts and goes to his bedroom to choose something to wear. He throws clothes on his bed, trying to find something, not that he wants to look awesome for somebody, and then he recognizes the batman t-shirt Liam borrowed him years ago. Yeah, he still has it. And not that Liam ever asks for it. Well now Zayn can give it to Liam back whenever he thinks and tosses it back into the closet. Finally he picks black tight jeans and black t-shirt. Then he goes back to the bathroom and styles his dark hair into the high quiff.  When he’s satisfied he pulls out his contact lenses and goes back to his room and grabs his thick black framed glasses.

He stands in front of Niall’s door and knocks. Harry opens it quickly, wearing only black boxer.

“Hey Zayn! Come in!” He says, already steps aside. “Nobody’s here yet actually. It’s early. Niall’s got pizza, thought, but if you want be quick, he’s just in the bathroom…”

“Yeah, It’s just… I was bored. ” He replies lamely,  sits next to Harry on a big couch and grabs the slice of a pizza. “Thanks” he adds.

“Bored? What about Liam? I thought you’d be like…I don’t know doing some roommate stuff. You look good by the way. Nice hairstyle.” Harry says and smirks.

“He’s working.” Zayn mumbles out and chews the pizza.

"No he’s not.” Replies Harry. “He was here actually about an hour ago. He said you were sleeping and he didn’t want to wake you up.”

Oh. “Well he told me he works, so… I don’t really know. But he’s not at the apartment now.” “I’m sorry Zayn.” Harry frowns at him, sounds really concern about it. Zayn doesn’t understand why.

“It doesn’t matter. He’s probably with his girlfriend now.” He replies vaguely. Fuck. Did he really just say it out loud? 

“With who? What girlfriend?” Harry says, confused look on his face.

Yeah. He definitely did say it out loud. 

“Oh, you mean Danielle! But they’re n…”

“Zayn! You’re early, man! And fuck, eating my pizza already.” Niall says cheerfully and leaves the bathroom. He shoots a weird look at Harry and grabs the last slice of a pizza. “FIFA?”

Zayn and Niall play FIFA and Harry does…whatever, who knows really, till the people start coming over. About nine pm there is about ten people and the only one who hasn’t show up yet is Liam.

“He’ll be here any minute. He just has lot of stuff to do you know.” Niall says to Zayn.

Right. So Harry with Liam’s best friend do this party for him and he has _stuff_ to do. And than the doorbell rings. Well about a fucking time, Zayn thinks. He wants to punch himself. He wants to punch himself right in the face so bad, because why does he even care? It’s not like Liam _owes_ them anything. And he probably has to do important things, not getting drunk and you know, hang out with Zayn.

“Coming!” Niall calls over the music.

Whoever is behind the door can’t probably hear him anyway, Zayn thinks and leans against the wall. He is not drunk, well at least yet, but he’s on his way. He should probably stop now, since it’s the first night he sort of spends with Liam. He actually laughs at this and puts the the beer on a table. He should stick with juice or something for the rest of the evening.

Niall opens the door and Liam and a girl, yeah, _that_ girl, enter the room. She has her arm wrapped around Liam’s waist as they approach the group of people. She’s pretty. She really is, Zayn must admit. She has dark long hair, brown eyes and wears red short and tight dress and black high-heels. She is hot. Maybe he should get drunk just for not think about her having exactly what Zayn needs so desperately but can’t have. But then he drops his gaze to Liam and fuck. Zayn is definitely not going to drink any more alcohol tonight because he certainly doesn’t want another “camp incident”. He looks good. Like really really _really_ good. He wears white tank top, tight black jeans and brown boots. Yeah, he definitely works out.  Also he has more tattoos than Zayn remembers. Fuck. Was that tank top necessary? Really? Zayn knows he’s staring.

Liam talks to Niall and some other people, smiling, and he looks cute and Zayn hates him. Hates him because Liam’s never like this when he talks to him. Because Liam is funny and sweet and genuinely cares about people. But he doesn’t care about Zayn. He drops his gaze and pull his phone out of his pocket. Really? How fucking pathetic is this.

He standsthere for a while and then and goes to the kitchen. Niall’s apartment is bigger than Zayn’s and he actually _has_ kitchen. He takes a bottle of water from a fridge and turns around to facing Harry who suddenly appears behind him.

“Hiii Zayn” he says slowly, smiling brightly as he leans against the table. “Not drinking tonight?” adds and point to the bottle. Harry’s really adorable when he’s drunk. Well he’s adorable all the time since you get used to all the weirdness that comes with him. “Yeah.” Zany replies, not really sure what else to say. Harry probably won’t remember any of this tomorrow. He’s lightweight and always end up wasted.

“Liam’s already here. Haven’t see you two talk to each other.” He continues. “I… right. I haven’t noticed he’s there.” Zany says, doesn’t sound convincingly. “No I meant you like -” he hiccups “-you don’t talk at all. Never.” Now he’s staring at Zayn. Did really Zayn just think Harry is adorable drunk? Well he takes it back now.

He will not remember it, Zayn reminds himself. Well at least Zayn can hope. Otherwise he would never do what he’s about to do now. The thing is Harry gets pretty fucking philosophical when he’s drunk. So maybe he could give him some sort of advice? Wow Zayn must be drunk, too, if he’s considering this as an option.

“I think he doesn’t like me very much.” Zayn says to Harry. He gives him a look and asks slowly “Why would you think that?”  “I don’t fucking know ok? I just think he found out I’m gay and maybe kind of like…into him and I don’t really know what I’ve done because I was pissed drunk and don’t remember a fucking thing. I think he never liked me but since the camping it gets even worse and I honestly have no fucking clue how we’re going to live together since he don’t even want to talk to me. I tried ok. But he just ignores me, but not in the impolite way so I can't like call him out on it. He’s just – fuck. Fuck. Harry, I’m fucked. I need you to switch with him. You can be my roommate and Liam will be Niall’s and everything’s gonna be awesome.” Zayn says, ending breathless.

“That’s not true.” Harry replies, concern look on his face. “That he doesn’t like you. I think it’s just a big misunderstanding between you two.” He adds slowly and yawn. “You should talk about it.” Continues, now sitting on a table.

“Yeah. But..” Zayn starts but the kitchen doors opens and the girl Liam brought by comes in.

“Hi, Zayn, right? We’ve met before. I’m Danielle, Liam’s friend.” She says, smiling and grabs two bears from a fridge. Zayn doesn’t really know what to say back, so he just smiles and waves at her. She leaves the kitchen and Zayn looks t Harry. “Oh and I forget to mention he has a girlfriend. He’s gonna fuck her in my flat.” He adds, sitting on a floor. “So that’s that’s what this is all about. A girlfriend.” Harry replies, sounds amused. “Than you should probab…” the door opens again and Niall comes in this time. “What the fuck are you two doing here?”

Two hours later Zayn is tired. Most everybody left already, even Danielle with some friends. Harry passed out hour ago and Niall and Liam drunkenly sings Paparazzi. How iconic, Zayn thinks as he watches them. The singing stops abruptly and Niall starts laughing. “’s time to get Liam home I guess.” He says. Liam, who sang just a second before is now laying on a table, breathing steadily.

Niall wakes him up and together with Zayn they drags him two floors, in front of Zayn’s apartment. They lean him against the wall next door and Niall quickly and unexpectedly hugs Zayn. “Thank, mate. ‘s really great Liam’s got place to stay now.” he says honestly and takes a step back. Zayn gives him confused looks. “Night! And don’t let him vomit on a couch!” he calls and chuckles as he runs the stairs down. Zayn is probably the only one who’s sober and he has no idea why Niall thanked him. Whatever. He has other things to deal with now. For example Liam who giggles and tries to hug Zayn while he’s looking for a keys.

He finally finds them and opens the door, carefully separating himself from Liam and grabbing his arm.

“Come on, I’ll get you to bed.” He says and turns to close the door. 

He still holds Liam’s arm to steady him as he’s locking the door but before he can turn back he feels and heavy weight press against his back.

“Oh sorry” Liam say and giggles. He takes a step back and Zayn turns. Liam almost falls but Zayn catches him and pull him up. He has to take a step back otherwise he would fall on Liam. His back hit the door and Liam is close, so fucking close. He smells like alcohol and cologne and he still giggles. “Hi.” He says and rests his forehead against Zayn’s. “I might be drunk.” He continues happily, his eyes closed. “You’re so nice to me, why are you so nice to me?” he mumbles.

And Zayn really can’t do this. He can't be this close to him now, when he's drunk and not speaks at all when he's sober. He shoves at Liam’s shoulders, pushing against him until he back up. “Let’s get you to bed” Zayn repeats, pushing Liam towards his room. “Let’s get me to bed” Liam says as he goes backwards and grabs Zayn t-shirt. “You look good today. I like a the glasses. You’re like a sexy secretary.” He’s looking at Zayn, eyes dark as he still let himself lead towards the bedroom and he still giggles. Like this whole thing is a fucking joke. Zayn doesn’t say anything and just continues pushing Liam until his legs hit the bed.

“Alright there we are.” He says. But Liam just stands there, still grabbing at Zayn’s t-shirt. “Thanks for taking care of me.” He says drunkenly, still too close it’s hard for Zayn to breathe properly. “That’s what friends are for, yeah.” He replies, trying to separate himself from Liam. “But we’re not really friends, Zayn.”

What? Is really going to do this now?

“I don’t even think we could be friends.” He adds, sounds almost desperate. He looks at Zayn weirdly and puts his other hand on Zayn’s hip. “I don’t want to be friend with you.” He mumbles and Zayn feels like having a panic attack. He can’t breathe. Why does he even start to live with him then? Just for telling him he doesn’t want to be  friends? What the fuck? He can’t just tell this to people. And why is he even doing this half hugging thing now?

Yeah, Zayn’s got it. Liam’s feel uncomfortable around Zayn, like it’s not the first time it happens to him. Straight guys sometimes think every gay wants to fuck ‘em. Well in this case Liam’s right about Zayn but it’s not the point. t's not like he’s going to jump him in his sleep for fuck’s sake. And now he kind of apologizes for being a jerk to him by basically telling him “yeah, you really are hot, and no, we still can’t be friends.”  He needs to get from Liam now. Like right now.

“Can I kiss you?” Liam says suddenly, sounds nervous.

What? Zayn’s eyes widen comically and he knows his face goes red. He can’t think straight. He’s not drunk but it feels like it. “You don’t really want to do this. You’re wasted.” He replies carefully, trying to take a step back. He really can’t, though because Liam still holds his t-shirt, his fingers digs almost painfully into Zayn’s hip.

“I really do, actually.” He says, eyes trailing down to Zayn’s lips. But he doesn’t move as he’s waiting for Zayn’s permission. And Zayn wants him to do it. He wants it so fucking bad. But he knows he can’t. He can’t do it to Liam when he’s drunk and vulnerable even thought he probably wouldn’t remember it. Fuck. Did he really just think about that? He needs to go _now_. He tears Liam’s hands off him forcefully and stumbles back. “You need to sleep.” He says, doesn’t know what else to do. He prays Liam’s wasted enough to not remember anything. Before he leaves the room he sees Liam sitting down and puts his head in his hands.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hiiii guyyyyssss! thanks for lovely comments and kudos!! xx  
> hope you'll like this chapter, i think there would be like one or two more. i have it already in my head but then when i want to write it down its just kind happens to be longer than i though it would be...anyway, hope you enjoy it!

Everything goes alright since the night. Well. Let’s say it’s bearable. It’s been a month since Liam and Zayn have started living together and things between them haven’t  changed much.

 The morning after the welcome party was awkward. Zayn thought it would be better to act like nothing happened and Liam apparently didn’t even remember it. He thanked Zayn for the bed, though. It’s been a month and sometimes they watch telly together. So it’s not that bad, Zayn thinks. Besides, Liam’s at work all the time, like really, is it even possible to work that much? And Zayn’s at school or work. So they don’t really see each other that often.

 But today’s gonna be a good day, Zayn thinks as he’s sitting in the living room, eating some sugary cereals. He doesn’t go to work, goes to school just for two hours and he has this project he wants to finish. Yeah, plenty of free time. Life is great sometimes. Would be better if Liam wasn’t in the bathroom now. Zayn really really wants to hide in his room just for a couple of minutes. He doesn’t understand why Liam always has to leave the bathroom just with a towel around his hips. See, it really doesn’t help Zayn to get over him. So he knows if he wants to keep his sanity, it would be better to avoid this situation that’s about to happen …now.

 Ups, to late, Zayn thinks as he turns his head to face the bathroom door. “Hi” he calls at Liam, it’s just a polite thing to do, right.

 “Hey, what are you watching?” Liam says back, leaning against the door frame. He’s staring at Zayn, not really doing anything else. He’s wet, water’s dripping down his body and Zayn wants to lick it.

 Fuck. Fuck! Focus, he reminds himself. He’s asking you something.

 “Um, don’t know really. Some cartoons.” He answers and turns back to pretend watching the telly. He has no fucking idea what’s on, because last ten minutes he was thinking about this particular moment. And anyway, this is usually the only conversation they have. Small talks. Maybe Liam asks about the weather. Or maybe he just goes to his room. Or…no. Zayn didn’t expect this.

 Liam doesn’t say anything. But he sits next to Zayn, put his legs on a coffee table.

 “I like this show. I used to watch it when I was a kid.”

 Great. Zayn has no idea what is it about and Liam is sitting so close and he’s almost naked and Zayn doesn't know what to do.

 “Yeah, um. I’ve never seen it before. So..” he says, staring at the tv violently. He is so not going to check Liam out. He is not going to do it. He is so much better that this. Or maybe he isn’t. Because now he’s looking at Liam out of the corner of his eyes and when he realizes Liam’s watching the tv, not paying attention to Zayn, he allows himself to turn to face him. Liam sits next to him calmly, hands resting on his belly, watching that stupid cartoon.

 “My sister thought it was stupid.” He says, not looking at Zayn. “But I thought it was funny. Still do, actually.” He adds and laughs.

 “Huh, yeah.” Zayn mumbles, not really listening. He should though, because they don’t have many moments like this. Liam usually don’t talk to him at all and when Zayn tries something, Liam just disappears in his room. He should fucking listening but he’s too busy staring at Liam. He is so toned and tanned and shit and Zayn's eyes fall lower to his abs and lower to his happy trail disappearing under the towel and his own pants feels suddenly too tight. He does not fantasize about sucking Liam off he reminds himself and licks his lips. Stupid towel. Stupid Liam with his stupid abs. Yeah, and fucking stupid Zayn, he thinks.

 “So, are you going to the club tonight?” Liam asks suddenly and looks at Zayn. He doesn’t have time to tear his gaze quickly enough and Liam totally caught him staring. Zayn looks Liam’s in the eyes, trying not to look guilty. He has confused look on his face but doesn’t say anything.

 Is it going to be always this weird between them? Zayn thinks.

 “Totally.” Lie. He answers and get up from the couch. This is getting so out of hand.

 “I’m going, too.” He calls after Zayn. “so it’s like…it’s ok if I bring somebody here with me? We didn’t really discuss it.” He blurts, staring at  the tv again. Zayn stops, looking at the back of Liam’s head. That escalated pretty quickly. He takes a deep breath. This has nothing to do with what happened moment ago he assures himself. Liam wouldn’t be such an asshole about it, right. I mean he doesn’t say anything directly to Zayn but just reminds him he has a sex life, of course, but not with Zayn, thank you very much. But It’s just a coincidence. Bad timing. And Zayn just overthinks everything. Just…Liam caught him staring on his crotch, and Zayn knows he wasn't really subtle.

 “Yeah I… whatever. Just not on a couch, but I’ve already told you that.” He say finally and disappears in the bathroom. He reaches for the tap, the sound of running water filling the room instantly and he gets into the shower.

 Zayn reaches for his soap, trying to not imagine Liam being here just minutes before him. He should not think about that but its easy to say it, but kind of hard to do it. And it gets even harder. He needs to get off so bad but Liam’s maybe still right behind the door – the thought of it shouldn’t be as hot as Zayn thinks it is – also getting off on the thought of his straight roommate is a fucking bad idea Zayn reminds himself as he wraps his fingers around his half hard cock. He tugs few times, trying to think about something - anything else but all he can come up with  is just the image of Liam sitting next to him on couch, half naked. Maybe he would let Zayn blew him. Maybe that wouldn’t be so gay for him. He would let him the first night, after the welcome party, Zayn thinks but he couldn’t do it to Liam.

 But he can do whatever he wants in his fantasy. Zayn closes his eyes, sucking a deep breathe. He speeds up his movement as he’s now imaging Liam going down on him, taking his cock all the way, looking at Zayn through his eyelashes. He lets out a breathe moan, he can’t help it. And Liam already left anyway, he assures himself as he’s tightening his grip. He hears weird sound but he can’t stop now, he’s so so close. He swipes his thumb over the head and comes seconds later, biting his lip to muffle any sound but he can’t prevent a breathless “Liam” that escapes  from his lips. Zayn groans both in pleasure and frustration, tipping his head back. There is a moment of silence when Zayn can hear only the running water and his panting breath but then he hears the sound he heard before again. Somebody’s opening the door. He holds his breath, panicking. Fuck. Fuck, is Liam here? How long he was here? Or maybe he didn’t really hear anything. And it was probably just the door. It’s broken shit, right. “Liam?” he  asks quietly. No answer. He slowly opens the shower curtains and peeks into the room. Nobody’s here. Thank gods, Zayn thinks. Liam have to left to work, just calm down.

 “Liam?” he calls once more after he leaves the bathroom, towel wrapped around his hips. No. The flat is empty. So the sound was probably just…whatever. Zayn is paranoid.

 He spent the whole day doing his school project and he enjoyed every second of it. But right now he has to survive these two hour of history and then he can go home, sleep. He really doesn’t intend to go to that club. First of all he’s tired. And second he just doesn't want to. What's the even point of looking at Liam sucking some nameless girl’s face off. And maybe he will bring this girl to their flat afterwards. Alright. So there is probably a reason why Zayn should go to the club after all. He could get shitfaced and get finally laid because he’s totally going mad. Why he even care about who Liam’s going to bring? None of his business.

 No, he’s not going. He decides finally as he drops his head on a desk. But a minute after the lesson ends his phone rings.

 “Hi Harry, what's up?” he says.

 “You’re totally going out with us.” He announces. “And don’t even try to get out of this because you didn’t go last time, and the time before. AND before. I’ll pick you up at school in ten minutes because we’re going to Louis’ first.” Harry adds. Zayn knows that negotiation is a wasted time. So he just critically looks at his t-shirt. It’s probably one of the worst he owns. there are stains from paint. Fucking stains. Zayn wonder for a while how he even could wear it to school. Oh yeah, probably because he doesn’t give a fuck.

 “Alright but I’ll see you at the club though, have to change.” And stay home he thinks, but doesn’t say out loud.

 “No fucking way, Zayn. No excuses. Remember last time? I just told you you always stand us up. I'll pick you up.” Ugh. Great, well he had to try it. But he still needs a clean t- shirt at least.

 “You know what, I will take you something, I’m just leaving my flat.”

 Harry and Niall has keys to Zayn’s flat as Zayn has to their.

 “Alright. Just t-shirt. Something black.” He says, tossing his stuff to a bag and grabbing his leather jacket. “See you.” He adds resignedly. He just hopes Louis let him use his bathroom because if Zayn wants to get laid tonight, he shouldn't look like a hobo.

 They meet up in front of the school and Zayn gets in the car. “Why do we even go to Louis’?” he asks.

 “Because he lives near the club. Besides I’m leaving my car there. We take taxi.” A moment of silence. “What?” he adds when Zayn grins. “Shut up, I’m getting drunk so I can’t drive. It has nothing to do with Louis.” He says defensively.

 “Yeah, I’m sure it doesn’t.” Zayn says and laughs. He doesn’t understand why they just don’t admit it. Everybody thinks they shag anyway. But Zayn knows they don't, Harry can’t lie for a shit.

 “I think he thinks I’m too young.” Harry says out of nowhere, sounds almost desperate.

 “Bullshit. He’s maybe 22 but he acts like 15 years old. Also I think he’s into you. He always gets this endearing look on his face when he’s with you I wanna kill myself.” Zayn says. “I mean you’re cute together.” Adds when he sees Harry’s wounded look.

 “Yeah but I’m not really subtle, you know. And he just… I don’t know. He just laughs it off. Every time. Maybe I could like kiss him. But I don’t wanna fuck it up. Or maybe I could kiss somebody else and if he does something, if he’s like jealous…”

 “Or maybe you could just told him the truth.” Yeah, and Zayn’s the right person to giving advices like this.

 “Maybe I could kiss you, than. I wouldn’t be like using somebody and we would kill two birds with one stone.” He says finally, turning his head to face Zayn. He smirks and Zayn doesn’t know what’s this all about.

 “What do you mean? What’s in it for me?” he says, confused.

 “Oh God, stop acting like you don’t know.” Harry answers and stops the car in front of Louis’ house. “I saw how you’re looking at him.” He says and turns to Zayn again.

 “I don’t know what are you talking about.” Zayn gasps. Is he really this obvious that Harry noticed? Did Liam noticed, too? He knows his eyes go wide as he thinks about it.

Harry must noticed because he adds “Don’t think he knows, though. If that’s what you’re thinking about right now. We should go inside. So just let me know if you wanna try it.” He adds, grabs his bag and opens the door. Louis waves at them from his window.

Louis’ parents house is huge. They’re both lawyers, which mean both they’re rich and never home. Louis used to have a nanny, but these days are over for years now.

They’ve spent there, in Louis’ room about two hours now. Niall came, too and Liam…well still works probably. Louis opened the bottle of vodka and now he’s sitting on Harry lap, laughing. Harry just smiles calmly, holding him around his waist. Zayn’s not even tipsy and Niall could probably drink the whole bottle without getting really drunk and he just lays on a sofa, playing on his iphone.

 “We should get ready!” Louis announces. “And by that I mean you should get ready, Zayn. The t-shirt is horrendous.” He adds and leans against Harry’s chest.

 “Yeah, thanks for pointing it out, Louis. Really.” Zayn says sarcastically. He doesn’t say anything but laughs into Harry’s neck.

 “Your stuff’s in my bag. I took your contact lenses, too. Just in case. Also clean underwear, you can thank me later, mate.” Harry says loudly, not really paying Zayn any attention.

 “Thanks, mate.” Zayn replies, kneels and grabs the bag. He finds the lenses and black boxer briefs first and than he fishes out the black t-shirt. It could any other t-shirt. Zayn has almost everything black. Every other fucking t-shirt but Harry had to take this one. The Liam’s Batman one. This is a fucking joke. He can’t wear it! This day was suppose to be great but this is certainly not good. Not good at all. And how Liam acted towards him this morning, besides he’s still not sure about the bathroom thing and now he should wear Liam’s t-shirt. No fucking way.

 “I can’t wear this!” he announces shakily as he’s holding the t-shirt above his head. “This is not even mine!”

“You don’t say.” Harry replies, laughing. “Are you aware it was in your room, right? Are you have a secret fuck buddy…”

 “I bet that’s Liam’s. He has like…thousands of batman t-shirts and shit like that. He wouldn’t mind. Probably get lost in the laundry or summit.” Niall says casually and goes back to his phone.

 “Liam wouldn’t mind at all.” Louis adds and whispers something to Harry. He just laughs, rolling his eyes. “I mean why would he? You, wearing his t-shirt. Well, again.” He says and Zayn can see the exact moment when he realizes it. “Oh! That’s that shirt, the one you  borrowed and never returned, right.” Louis continues, giggling. “Anyway, unless you want to wear this thing you already wear,” Louis adds, disgusted look on his face, “or wearing something of mine” which both of them know Zayn would never do, Louis like bright colors, ugh,  “you have to wear it. Bathroom’s on a left.” He says, raising his eyebrows. “And when you’re there, do something with your hair, too. Use whatever you want!” Louis calls after him.

 And really, when Zayn enters the bathroom, there is so many hair product he doesn’t even know what to use. He takes a quick, cold shower. There isn’t really much he can do now, so he styles his hair and changes his clothes, and grabs his glasses. He doesn’t want to take lenses, anyway. He rolls up his short sleeves a little because it’s too big and looks at himself in the mirror. Alright, it doesn’t get any better now. There are paint stains on his dark tight jeans, too, but it looks kinda cool. At least Zayn thinks. Louis would probably told him he looks like an idiot who forget to change, before he went clubbing. Well. He can’t really do anything about it now, right.

 “We’re leaving now Zayn!” Louis says loudly, loudly enough for Zayn to hear him.

 “Alright, coming!” he says back and grabs his leather jacket. “Can I leave my bag here? I’ll pick it sometimes this weekend.” Zayn asks when he comes back to the room. “Don’t want to like…take it with me now.” He adds.

 “Sure, now come on, the taxi’s waiting.” Louis replies, leaning against the door frame.  “And Liam’s waiting, too.” He mumbles, smirking, when Zayn passes him. Or maybe Zayn just imaging things, wouldn’t be the first time, right. 

When they gets to the club, the place is packet but of course, Niall kind of knows one barmaid and after about ten minutes sitting on bar she got them a booth. Liam is still not there, not that Zayn cares, right, but he suppose to come soon. Well at least Niall says. They get to the booth a order some drinks for a start. They talks about random stuff, enjoying the night, Liam still nowhere to be seen.

As the night goes on, Zayn feels he’s might be drunk. Niall is chatting with some girl on his lap, Harry and Louis’ been dancing for a while now and Zayn scans the crowd around him. He doesn’t know what exactly he’s looking for but every time he makes eye contact with some guy, there is something Zayn doesn’t like. Too short, blonde, whatever. He’s about to heading to the bar when he sees Liam. His Liam dancing with a guy. A guy. A guy who definitely isn’t Zayn because Zayn stands right there, next the booth, incredulous look on his face. What the fuck is happening? Why does this nameless guy dance with him? His back presses against Liam chest, his arm around Liam’s neck. No no no. No. This is not happening. So is he like bi? Or what? Zayn is too drunk to understand any of this. Maybe he’s dreaming. Yeah, more like totally going mad. But than the guy – that stupid fucking …ok he’s gorgeous, of course he is,  turns so he’s facing Liam and he starts kissing his neck. And Liam really doesn’t seem to mind. Actually he closes his eyes, hugs this guy around his waist to bring him closer. Zayn can’t watch this. He turns and goes straight to the bar. He needs to do something to distract himself, so he won’t do anything stupid. Like drag Liam to the bathroom and gives him a blow job. Because he would so do it if it meant that the nameless guy would stop touching him. He drinks another vodka shot, he has no idea how many he had already but it doesn’t matter anyway, and turns to face a guy who sits next to him. He’s been watching Zayn since he came to the club, but Zayn wasn’t interested, well, until now. He’s tall, taller that Zayn, with grey eyes and blonde hair. Not exactly his type but it would do. He’s drunk enough to not care. Zayn could fuck him, or the other way around. Zayn really doesn’t mind.

“Hi, are you alone here?” obviously not, Zayn thinks, but the truth is, he kind of is alone. Now anyway.

“I’m Zayn.” He replies, not really looking for a small talk. He wants to get off. He’s been horny all week and it’s time to break is three-months dry spell. Well, its not so much of a dry spell, more like Zayn’s kind of picky, see, its one night stand, he’s not looking for a great personality. No. The only think he needs is get Liam out off his head, even if its just for a while. And jerking off in a shower’s not enough. Zayn knows he’s good looking. And it’s not about being vain, it’s just a fact. He has dark hair, brown eyes and cheek bones most people would kill for.  Also people apparently love mysterious types. But they just never get to close enough to find out Zayn’s not mysterious, just shy and a little awkward. Or Zayn won’t let them. It must be the leather jacket and the tattoos, Zayn thinks as he’s leaning against the bar, watching the stranger.

“Alex.” He says,” I like your shirt.” He continues. Yeah, that’s not something Zayn wants to talk about.

“Wanna dance?” he asks, drink another shot the bartender put in front of him and grabs Alex’s hand, not waiting for an answer.

The music is so loud and there is so many people, Zayn dances, back pressed against Alex chest. He brushes his crotch against Zayn’s ass, he can feel the length of him pressed against his ass.

He shouldn’t have drunk that last shot. His head is spinning and if Alex doesn’t hold him around his waist, he would probably fall. Zayn can feel his hot breath on his neck and down on his shoulder.

“Wanna go somewhere else?” Alex asks, rocking his hips into him. No. Not really. Zayn think, he’s so wasted he can barely walk. He tries to say no, but Alex doesn’t hear him, or maybe just doesn’t listening and leads him towards the back door.

Zayn has no idea how they get there but now he has his back pressed against a brick wall. All he can see are bins full of trash, there are people but far away, or maybe it just feels like far, Zayn has no idea. He can still hears the music from a club but its muffled. And than there is also Alex, or whatever his name is, grinding against him.

“Get off me” Zayn says, trying to push him away. But he just pins his wrist down and laughs, biting Zayn’s ear lobe.

“Hon, you know you want it. Want me to fuck you.” He whispers, kissing Zayn’s collar bone.

“Get off me” he repeats again, trying to kick him, but he’s pressed against the wall and can’t move. He knows Alex drunk, too. Not as much as Zayn, though. This is so not going to end up good. 

But what happens now was so quick Zayn’s not sure he get it all. When Alex tries to turns him, so he’d be facing the wall, Zayn has time to kick him hard, at the same moment somebody grabs Alex by the back of his shirt and pulls him away from Zayn. He falls down, leaning against the wall, breathing heavily. He can see Alex running away shouting something he can’t hear and somebody’s bending over him.

“’…you alright?” he asks. Zayn looks up to see Liam. He has worried look on his face. “Are you alright? Zayn?” he repeats, shaking Zayn’s shoulder a little.

“What?” he asks. “What are you doing here?”

“I don’t know, I just…I .. I saw you with that guy so I though I …check if you’re alright. I mean you didn’t look like you knew what's going on so I…” Zayn doesn’t know what Liam says anymore because he turns to his side and throws up. “Fuck..” he says and wipes his mouth with the back his hands. He leans on the wall again, hiding his face in his hands. “Fuck, promise me you never tell.” He croaks out. “Yeah, do you want me to get you someone? Harry? Just wait a sec, I’ll be right back. That other guy ran away, so don’t be…I mean…” he stops and watches  Zayn for a few seconds, weird look on his face.

“I’m fine.” Zayn says and lights a cigarette. “I’ll just need a moment.” He’s not even lying. When he threw it all up, he feels better that before. At least he knows what's going on around him. He carefully stands up, tossing his phone out of a pocket. “I’ll just head home I guess." and than he laughs. He has no idea why, he just feels like it. This is just so ridiculous. Was he saved or cockblocked by Liam?

“I’ll let Niall know, Harry’s probably with Louis anyway.” He says, writing a message. Well at least he hopes he writes something understandable. There’s no point in calling them anyway, the music in the club is too loud.

“You can go with me. I already call a cab, like ten ten minutes ago. He should be here by now.” Liam says, looks unsure. Yeah, Liam’s drunk, too. He’s never this kind to Zayn. He almost says yes, still doesn’t know whether to laugh or cry about this whole situation, but then he remembers that nameless guy, who was kissing Liam’s neck on the dance floor. Will he be in the car, too? Zayn has no idea how long it was since he saw them dancing. It could be twenty minutes, it could be an hour. Maybe they already….no. Zayn closes his eyes, trying not to imagine it. He has no right, anyway. It’s not like Liam was his…anything.

“No. I’ll stay here.” He says, heading inside.

“But you just said you’ll…” Liam replies, following him to the bathroom. Zayn reaches for a tap, rinsing his mouth. “I know what I’ve said.” He snaps. Liam looks at him, wounded look on his face. Great, so now Zayn is the mean one. “I’m sorry, I just don’t want to …you know..” he says, doesn’t know how to continues. Liam watches him, confused. “I mean you’re taking someone with you, right.” He adds, feeling totally stupid. “I saw you dancing…” Zayn continues after Liam still doesn’t seem like he understand. “Oh! You mean that! No, it was…it didn’t work out.”

Right. Zayn has no idea what this suppose to means. “Well than since you already have a taxi waiting for you…” he says, thinking "what the hell, anyway" and leaves the bathroom, Liam behind him.

The ride home is awkward. But from a different reason than usually, when they spend time with each other. Actually Liam’s blabbering about random stuff the whole time, he seems pretty nervous, his hand on Zayn’s knee. Well. And Zayn finds it funny. Don’t ask him why, never. He’d probably stab you with a fork.. or whatever. No, but really. Since he threw up, he’s not really _that_ much intoxicated. Well he’s still drunk, and also very aware of Liam’s hand.

The taxi stops in front of their building and they somehow get to their apartment. First thing Zayn does is brushing his teeth and when he’s already in bathroom, he takes a quick shower, too. He hates that bar smell. He goes to his room right after, doesn’t really know what Liam does. Probably sleeps already. He shakes the towel down from his hips, not bothering to hang it somewhere, he will deal with it tomorrow. Maybe. And and tosses some clean shirt and sweats out from a drawer. He considers wearing brief boxer, too, but last time he was drunk and tried to put them on, he somehow tangled in them, felt and hit his back. Better not risk it, right. He locates his phone, checking if he got any messages from other guys. Niall and Harry stays at Louis’, he reads. He’s glad, because he doesn’t have to worry about them and he heads to the living room. He supposed to be tired but he’s just not.

Zayn can hear running water from the bathroom so he just jumps on a couch and turns the tv on. Some stupid reality show is on, so he lays on his back, hands resting on his belly, when Liam leaves the bathroom. Zayn just stares on a ceiling. He can’t see Liam but he knows he goes to his room. Alright, Zayn’s not disappointed, he is not. It’s not like he expected him actually talk to him.

“Night!” he calls anyway, no need to be an asshole.

“Oh, I don’t go to sleep. Yet.” Liam calls back. “I’m not tired. We can watch telly, I’ve got new Iron Man movie, if you want.” He continues, still being in his room. Zayn sits up quickly. Oh.

“Yeah!” he says loudly, and too enthusiastically he thinks. “I’ll probably… fall asleep halfway through the movie anyway..” he continues, hitting himself in his forehead. Why the fuck he just said that? “I mean I love iron man but like..” Shut the fuck up he thinks, covering his face with his hands. But he can already hear Liam going towards the couch.

“You don’t have to..” he says, sounds weird.

What the fuck is wrong with him? He praise for opportunity to talk to Liam every day and now, when he seems like he actually wants to do something together, Zayn acts like an asshole. And feels like an fifteen years old, because Liam is cute and Zayn wants to kiss him. Get your shit together he thinks, and stands up.

“No. I do want you.”

Fuck.

“I mean I want to. Watch the movie. Great idea, uh. Weed?” he adds, already disapearing in his room. Fuck fuck fuck. No, he’s drunk, Liam’s drunk, he won't remember this. It was just. What it was exactly? Nevermind. He fishes a joint from a drawer and goes back to the living room. Liam's already set up the movie and now he’s sitting on a couch, legs on a coffee table as usually.

“Hi.” Zayn says as he’s sitting next to him. Really, Zayn? Really?? He thinks. Liam just smiles at him, leaning against the couch. He lights the joint and takes a hit and blows out and the thick smoke fills the air. He passes the joint to Liam without a word.

“Thanks. This one is my favorite..” Liam says, nodding towards the tv. “I didn’t really like the second, though.” Zayn watches him for a while, Liam watches the movie. “I didn’t know you’ve already seen it.” Is the only thing he can come up. How pathetic is that. He wants to tell him so many things, first of all how much he loves this moment, when they just sits next to each other, watching a telly, and Liam looks actually relaxed.

But than he turns and as he  passes him the rest of the joint, their fingers brushes. Zayn takes it from Liam, trying to keep it cool, but he still watches him. It feels like the time slows down, the joint burns him fingers so Zayn licks his lips and inhales deeply one last time and tosses the fag in an empty mug on a table. He feels Liam’s eyes on him the whole time as he leans back.

“Did you enjoy the night? I mean in a club.” Zayn asks slowly, his tongue feels heavy. He wants to reach out and slides his hand into Liam’s hair. Not a good idea, he reminds himself.

“Not really.” He replies, closing his eyes. “I’m enjoying it now, though.” He adds. Zayn doesn’t know what to say. “Thanks for helping me… get rid off that twat.” He mumbles finally, reaching for Liam’s arm but halfway through the movement he realizes what he’s doing and put it on a couch instead. Yeah, smooth, Zayn, really smooth. Liam looks at him again, heavily lidded eyes.

“I didn’t cockblocked you, did I?” he asks conversationally.  

“Kind of.” Zayn says not even thinking. What?  “I mean no!” Well. Liam laughs, turning his whole upper body towards Zayn, sitting on one leg. “So yes or no?” he asks, tilting his head. Zayn fucking giggles. He’s drunk, ok, and stoned. And Liam’s talking to him. He rolls his eyes and turns so he’s sitting the same way as Liam.

“I wanted, at first. But.. I don’t really remember what happened. Guess I drunk too much. It feels like yesterday, doesn’t it.” He says, half laughing. It’s so easy to talk to Liam now. “But no, you didn’t cockblock me, I think.” He says, resting his head on a couch.

Liam smiles like he’s glad to hear that but that his looks changes rapidly. Suddenly his gaze darkens, his eyes falling to Zayn’s lips. “But you did.” He says slowly.

“What? I did what?” Zayn asks, confused.

“You did cockblock me.” He says, still staring at Zayn mouth. “You know I was dancing with this guy, “ he continues, slowly moving towards Zayn, bringing an arm in front of himself, supporting his weight. But not touching Zayn. Not yet.

“And it was alright, I almost forget who I am with. But then I saw you.” He says, licking his lips “with that…” instead of saying it out loud he makes a vague hand gesture “...and you was wearing my shirt” he looks at Zayn’s body for a moment and then his hand fists in front of his shirt, disappointed look on his face for a second, but then he’s looking straight into Zayn’s eyes again. And Zayn is frozen, literally. He just can't move, forgets to breathe.

“..and he was pushing you out of the club, somewhere…” he leans even more, Zayn can no longer see his almost black eyes, but he is so close now Zayn can smell his body spray, he feels his hot breath on his neck. He knows he’s hard now, regretting not wearing those stupid boxers.

“I couldn’t let him have you.” Liam says and then he kisses Zayn’s neck roughly. He doesn’t really want think about how bad it would be next day, the day when either of them would be drunk, not now when it feels so fucking great. So that’s why Zayn gets his hands around Liam’ neck, pulling him closer. But Liam pulls back abruptly, searching for something in Zayn’s eyes.

He stares down at him, lips parted. And Zayn doesn’t want this over. Not yet. He’s already on a highway to hell, better enjoy it. So he grabs Liam’s face, brings his closer again and kisses him. He wanted this so long. And Liam kisses him back, tugging his hair. Zayn pushes his hands under Liam's shirt, sliding up his back, pulling him even closer. But then Liam shoves him against he couch, stands up and climb on top of Zayn, his legs on either side of his waist, kissing him again. He pushes his tongue into Zayn’s mouth, Zayn kissing him back, panting embarrassingly.

“Shirt off.” Liam say against him mouth and pulls back. Zayn looks up at him, confused. "Zay, shirt off." he repeats. So he leand up and quickly tugs it off, tosses it somewhere and that he has Liam’s weight on him again. He kisses Zayn again, licks into his mouth and then his lips slides down, kissing along Zayn’s jaw, biting his ear lobe. “I want you so much.” he whispers, breathless. Zayn’s not sure if he really heard it but he doesn’t care. He can’t stop now, he’s so hard and Liam grinds on him just right, their cocks slides together and than Liam pushes his hand into Zayn’s sweats, wrapping his fist around Zayn, pumping it slowly. He arches and pushing into Liam’s hand, moaning his name. Liam pulls back, looking him in the eyes and than he leans forward again, kissing Zayn’s collar bone, and then he moves lower, lower,  looking at Zayn with wide eyes, tugging at his sweats. Zayn lifts his hips, and Liam tugs it all the way down. He bites Zayn’s thigh, panting. Zayn popes up on his elbows, looking down at Liam who kisses his hips now, his stubble burns against his skin. And then he looks up again, smirks and wrap those puffy and red lips around the head of Zayn’s cock. He grabs at Liam’s hair, trying to not push into his mouth.

He slides down him until he’s hitting back of his throat and than he slides back up, wrapping his hand around Zayn. He licks the the head of his cock, jerking him with a spit slicked hand. Zayn knows he can’t hold it any longer. Not when Liam has his lips lips wrapped around his cock, grinding against the couch to release tension in his own pants. He can feel the tightening in his stomach and tries to pull Liam away but he just looks up at his with those wide eyes and speeds up. Zayn falls against couch, moaning Liam’s name shamelessly before he comes down his throat.

When Liam finally pulls off him, his lips slick with spit and come. He wipes his mouth with his hand and leans back, hovering over Zayn again. He feels so weak. “Oh my god, Liam.” He breaths, reaching down, pushing his hand into Liam’s briefs. “Fucking Christ.”

He tosses his hand away. “I’m good.” Liam says, grinning, and kisses Zayn again, softly. It’s different that the first time. And that he pulls back,stands and turning the tv off. He covers Zayn with blanket. And leans again just to kiss his forehead. “Another time.” He whispers. “Night.” And than he disappears in his room. Zayn falls asleep right away, dreaming about a cute boy with brown eyes and bright smile. 

 


End file.
